A Temporary Memory (Oil Knights Book 2) by Marie Johnston

Author:Marie Johnston [Johnston, Marie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: LE Publishing
Published: 2023-11-15T16:00:00+00:00

Cody

What the hell did I just say?

Tova’s lush lips parted. She must think I was lowering myself to her ex’s level. I had no other explanation. The words had popped out, like they’d been caged in a dark, terrifying corner of my mind and escaped at the worst possible time.

“You weren’t happy?” she asked softly.

The strings anchored me to this world. I wasn’t lost in the past. The guitar marked a time before Meg. The last time I felt like myself. “I wasn’t unhappy.”

She was quiet for a beat. “I understand that more than I thought I would.”

I glanced at her, surprised, but I was met with an understanding stare. “You do?”

“I wasn’t in love with Frederick. But I thought we had a mutual relationship, and I was okay that it wasn’t built on love.” Her smile dipped. “I know it’s not the same as you and your wife, but I get it.”

“I loved my wife.” I plucked the G string. I should’ve been doing guitar therapy since the funeral. The sound soothed my nerves, made my world seem like it was spinning in the right direction. “I respected her more.” I hadn’t thought a lot about my relationship with Meg as much as I had in the last few weeks. It just was. Like when Mama left, and I was it for my siblings. It just was. The kids needed a stable home, and my in-laws fit the description better than me. It just was. I was thinking about it all now. “I knew I was a lucky bastard that a woman like her was interested in me. That she moved here, away from the city, and still managed to kick ass at a job made five times more difficult because she was stuck with me.”

“I think you’re selling yourself short.”

“You didn’t know Meg. She was amazing.” I strummed over all the strings again. “But she was also Meg. Prickly. Moody. Ambitious in a way where she’d never be satisfied in Buffalo Gully. She wasn’t warm, and she kept her emotions tightly wound until I wondered how deeply she actually felt.” I plucked the strings harder. I forced myself to be gentle. The last thing I wanted was for the kids to hear me. “Even when the tumor was diagnosed, she was practical. Almost businesslike. I thought maybe it was a defense mechanism. What the fuck did I know about finding out I was dying? But . . . I’m not sure. She was ruthlessly efficient and almost harder on me—and the kids,” I finished with a sigh of resigned admission.

“I didn’t know her, but it sounds like a defense mechanism.”

“I don’t know,” I murmured. “We were married for twelve years, and at first it was fine. Then Grayson came and life got busier, and she seemed to thrive on the stress, but she wasn’t a doting mom. I was surprised when she got pregnant with Ivy. She said it was so they’d have each other to play with. Like cats.

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